Blending Holidays
Halloween and Christmas have had a very long rivalry. Despite the intervention of Thanksgiving, the
commercialization of Christmas always tries to smother Halloween in a wash of sales and slogans. This
year, for me at least, it actually succeeded in blotting the best night of the year out of existance.
Therefore, it's about time for Halloween to strike back, so put on a mask, eat some candy, and stick a
copy of The Nightmare Before Christmas in the VCR and get ready for a Halloween themed Christmas! The
eggnog can stay though.
I'm not the only one whose prone to getting a bit of Halloween in their Christmas. Sluggy Freelance
has been doing it for the last couple of years. Thor has done it for as long as I can remember... but
then I've seen him stretch Halloween through Independence Day. And speaking of Thor, let me just say
that I feel PRETTY bad about leaving this somewhat whiney rant that hits
people up for money up while he's been lying
in a gutter car somewhere on the verge of death in rather poor health
these last few months. Heck, to be honest, I felt bad about leaving that up more than a week. Haven't
had any net access though, so there it was. Now I can make it up to him though by leaving THIS rant up
way longer than I planned.
Moving on though, there's a large number of reasons I like Halloween more than Christmas. While all the other holidays celebrated in this country are either political or Christian holidays that have been so twisted and merchandised that it's quite sickening at times, PARTICULARLY Christmas. Halloween has really never changed all that much. Granted, the average person (myself included) doesn't quite recall the historical signifigance, the spirit survives quite nicely.
Halloween is also a whole lot more subdued. The week of Halloween, you will generally see a halloween episode of most TV shows, including in the case of The Simpsons those wonderful short story collections (which lately are clearly out of ideas but let's not dwell on that). There wouldn't be ANY Halloweenish movies out there if not for Tim Burton either. Christmas on the other hand gags you with the suckers. There's at least a MONTH around Christmas where all you see is Christmas episodes, and movies, and they're all EXACTLY THE SAME! Then there's the music too. Christmas has how many songs? And how many of those DON'T suck? About 1 by my count. That one that's always being sung by a choir with a voice range so high I can never tell what language it's in. Don't hear that one too often though. Halloween doesn't have a single one, but the honorary Halloween song, Monster Mash, is at least pretty decent.
Halloween is ALSO much better on one's morale. Even if you're dirt poor and have no friends, all you need to do is whip up a quick costume and you can get the fullest enjoyment from the evening. With Christmas though, all your problems are right there in your face. Strapped for cash? There's the guilt of not buying people presents. Low on friends? You can tell by how many present you get. It can get quite morbid really. Heck, take me for example. This year all I could give anyone was a box full of taped Farscape episodes to circulate around, and all I got from anyone was a hundred bucks and a Wolfwood action-figure (which is actually pretty darn spiffy. It even has a huge strip of cloth to wrap the cross with).
Anyway though, this brings me to the centerpiece of this update. Thanks to a combination of Halloween guilt, Christmas guilt, and having nothing better to do without a net connection for the last month and a half, I dusted off and completed...
Tyranny - The Demonic Diceless RPG
As the name says, it's a diceless RPG. If you don't know what a diceless RPG is, read the introduction. Now mind you, while the primary reason I'm posting this is that I was really in the mood to give you all a nice big Halloweenchristmas surprise, it's also a little experiment. I have no trouble recieving positive support and gifts from people, but I've never gotten anything from anyone not related to me that cost them any money (save about... 4 paychecks). I am therefore curious if I am cursed. Therefore, despite the textual nature, this game here is shareware. Which means of course that if you like it, and you aren't a deadbeat, you should really try and throw $10 at me.
Here's a little math on this. Number of people I expect to see a link to this rant in the next week: 5000. Percentage of them I can expect to click said link: 10. People who will therefore see this page: 500. Percentage of them I expect to then click the Tyranny link (or for that matter, bother to read past the Slime World): 20. People who will therefore see that page: 100. Percentage of THEM I expect to not turn around in disgust upon finding out what a diceless RPG actually IS, or other reasons: 50. (Although, what these people were hoping for IS what the 4th expansion is scheduled to contain.) People who will therefore actually enjoy the game: 50. Percentage of the population I'm told actually pays $10 shareware fees: 10. Therefore, before my next rant goes up, I can expect about $50 to appear in my paypal account. If this actually happens, then honestly, out of the guilt mentioned way way up there near the Slime World, I'll probably take that money and send it right to Thor, since he has successfully guilt-tripped me into feeling guilty about anyone recieving money for anything but him. Heck, if you want, you could cut out the middle man and just donate $10 to him in my name, but make sure I can verify it somehow or you don't get your gold star. More to the point, if I see that $50, I will DEFINATELY make posting the first sourcebook my top priority. I already have most of it ready, but without some show of support I can't justify taking the time out of all the other things I do to finish it up. Conversely, if I see squat in that account, then I will promptly get quite mopey and depressed and whine about stupid stuff to anyone who makes the mistake of coming in earshot, and not do anything amusing or productive (like update this page) for a couple weeks. Oh, and no, that isn't blackmail. I just have surprisingly little self-esteem for a person in my position. Just be glad I'm not prone to ripping my whole page down in fits of despair like all the others do.
Speaking of this page and the amusement it brings, you know my Scary Pics? Those images at the end of every rant where I take a couple anime characters and splice them together in a disturbing and humorous fashion? This rant is the last you'll be seeing of them... with a few exceptions, mostly around Halloween. I feel kinda bad about it, as they ARE the only thing I've ever thrown onto this site which has not since become such a trendy fad that everyone has one. Still, I feel it's time, because A- They take an AWFUL AWFUL lot of time, effort, and inspiration, and B- Quite frankly, there's only so much that can be done with the medium. Over the last... what? 84 rants? Minus a few reruns of course, I have MORE than covered the ground. So poof, off they go, into the night, ne'er to be seen again save the rare occassion my muse pulls out her frying pan, or perhaps by special request.
Don't feel glum though, because without the heavy burden of the scary pics, I should be able to crawl out of my cave on a WEEKLY basis to rant at you, not the current... what? Quarterly? schedule I seem to be on. The rants are out there, mostly in the form of the letters to my cousin which soak up all the really funny stuff I think up between finishing scary pics. Don't believe me? Here's an excerpt from a letter I found digging around in my Big Folder Of Mail To Do Stuff With:
Oh, by the way, a neat little idea just occurred to me. Have an RPG campaign inspired by Dark City. As in, after every adventure, the GM takes everyone's character sheets, shuffles them, and randomly redistributes them. Whether you let minds stay with players or characters really would depend on the game you're playing. I think GURPS would be best. Especially if the PCs knew about it ahead of time so that they could make... painful characters. Or the GM could just throw a couple extras into the mix. GM: "OK, you wake up. You can't see too well out of your single eye because your monicle is on the table next to you. As you can see from the dirty piece of shatter glass on the floor of your leanto you ARE at least the most beautiful girl in the world despite the peg leg and the hook hand. Oh, and your insatiable desires for head cheese and a rich husband are both quite unsatisfied. Also, your pet badger is hungry." PC: "Bill, I am going to kill you for making this character." Bill: "Hey! At least the character /I/ made has legs! Thanks for the robotic ox though."
See? You people miss out on most of the GOOD stuff just because I'm spending 2 weeks searching for a picture of Gendo with the head at JUST the right size and angle to stick on the body of Speed Racer. Not anymore though!
Come to think of it, I really need to throw my big list of RPG rule varients up some time.
and now...
here it... doesn't come actually. The stack of letters containing the ingredients for my halloween
pic disappeared when my cable provider bit the big one. I'll track it down again ASAP and wedge the pic
in here, so the passage of time will obscure this one nasty blemish on an otherwise good rant.
