"Konnichiwa, dorklings!"

     "Coney-what?" Joel squinted at the monitor that displayed the interior of Dr. Forrester's lab. "And why are you wearing makeup and a... yellow... vinyl... top hat?" Well, he'd always known life in captivity on a satellite would make him go nuts someday...

     "Since the nation of Japan has brought such great things to our experiment - such as Gamera and Godzilla vs. Megalon," Dr. F explained, "Frank and I decided to explore their culture further."

     The view on the monitor pulled back, and Joel discovered with horror that the scientist was wearing a matching bustier. Beside him, Frank waved cheerfully, dressed in red patent leather and feathers. "We've started a j-rock band!" he said gleefully.

     "But..." Joel didn't even know where to begin. "...You're not Japanese..."

     "And you can't play music," Crow added helpfully.

     "That's the beauty of it," Dr. F stated. "Our style is 'visual kei' - it doesn't matter how badly we play, just as long as we look interesting." He paused, and smiled evilly. "The girls will flock to us..."

     "I wouldn't count on that," Joel said dubiously.

     Tom, on the other hand, hovered by the monitor almost anxiously. "Actually... I think it's kind of hot. ...And by hot, I mean completely non-sexy," he corrected himself, seeing the looks that Joel and Crow gave him.

     "So, uh... do you actually know any Japanese?" Crow asked.

     "Not much, but that's all right," Dr. Forrester replied with a shrug. "Normally these bands aren't even named in Japanese - and in keeping with that trend, by the way, we've decided to call ourselves Et Fromage."

     Joel and the bots stared for a moment, as Frank bounced up and down impatiently. "Can we play our song now?" he whined.

     Dr. Forrester nodded. "Feel privileged, pookies," he addressed the camera, "you're about to witness the first ever performance of Et Fromage! Hit it, Frank."

     Frank did indeed hit it, and with a chord which both set Joel's teeth on edge and made Tom's head explode. "Namida no kamikaze sushi honey!" he belted out, posing in something that might have been intended as a provocative manner. "Kokoro wa neko tsunami babyyyyyy!"

     "N-nah n-n-nah n-nah n-n-n-naaahhh!" harmonized Torgo, dressed in sky-blue velvet behind the keyboard.

     The aural assault continued until a minute or so later, when Dr. F looked up to the screen monitoring the bridge of the satellite, and realized that no one was there. "Hey! How dare they leave in the middle of our performance?" Frank said, wounded.

     "It seems they're in the theater," Dr. F muttered, and clicked a button to view that part of the satellite instead.

     Joel, Tom, and Crow were sobbing pitifully in the seats. "Start the movie!" Joel begged.

     "Pleeeeaaaaase!" Crow wailed.

     Later that night, after the horror had ended, Gypsy did a double-take at Cambot's tape of the momentuous event. "Oooh," she cooed. "Frank looks so... what's the word? Kowai!"

     Crow hesitated. "...I'd correct her... but I think she got it right."